Spell My Name

I have a simple name, and a fairly common - infamous even - last name. But every time I talk to somebody at a call center, they make me spell it out for them. I have to go through the A for apple, N for Nagpur shit, and in spite of all that when I get my ticket or "parcel" or whatever, it's always addressed to Dare Antulay or Dave and Thulay.
I don't hold this against them. They probably go through a lot everyday - like having to deal with the fact that Sharman Joshi is going to play one of them in a movie.
No, seriously, I think they go through a lot everyday like trying to figure out the precise hour my irregular motions take me to the loo so that they can call and enquire whether or not I need a personal loan.
No, seriously, really, they go through a lot everyday like trying to figure out which pub I'm going to try and get a quick beer at so that they can show up and display their pre-puberty gregariousness at a table too close to me.
But anyway, regardless of the reason, I figure that it doesn't matter how I spell out my name for them, these semi humans at the call center are always going to get it wrong. So I' decided to come up with my own smart-ass spelling scheme that I'm going to use from now on. Some of them - as you will see - proved to be a stretch for my creativity. If you've got a better suggestion for any one of them, lemme know.

A as in Aisle
B as in bee
C as in cent
D as in Djibouti
E as in Istanbul
F as in ephemeral
G as in jijaji (I hate this one. Gotta be a better one for G)
H as in hour
I asinine
J as in gesticulate
K as in knee
L as in elicit
M as in emit
N as in known
O as in oesophagus
P as in pneumonia
Q as in queue
R as in argument
S as in pseudonym
T as in tea
U as in yuletide
V as in wheel (Come one, you know it, all desis say veel and not wheel)
W as in www
X as in exhale
Y as in why not
Z as in xylophone

I hope the next time I try to book a ticket the call center moron has a sense of humor, and doesn't book me to fucking timbucktoo